At some point you've probably used a version of this phrase: "It's ok, but I'm not married to it." As it should, use of the word "marriage" indicates deep and abiding commitment, both emotional and legal.
I attended a local meet-up recently and spoke with Marie, a media training colleague who has long had an interest in long form documentary film work. Marie was eager to be on a project that increased her skills in an area where she could enthusiastically learn new talents and lend her storytelling expertise. Right now she works for a reputable media organization as a producer. It's a good job and Marie works around very creative people, but she's looking for more. Several years at even a decent gig can cause you to start humming that Talking Heads song. You know the one: "same as it ever was, same as it ever was." But, enough about me.
After the meet-up Marie sent me an e-mail explaining, "I know at some point you and I have talked plenty about preparedness and planning. I just extricated myself from a project I was working on with someone who was very emotionally tied to it, but who was not focused or organized at all. That’s especially problematic when 1) it’s a type of project new to the parties involved, and 2) the type of project is a documentary film. Films have far more moving parts than other kinds of passion projects."
Here is where I responded, "Sounds like the leader is married to the project but not in a good way."
I tend to "marry" the projects I lead. But as I told Marie, I try to construct teams of people who understand their role while my job is to make sure nothing gets in the way of them doing what they do best. If you are going to work on a team of mine, I'm going to do all the big and little things needed to ensure each team member comes away feeling (a) respected (b) special for working on that team (c) eagerly wanting to come back and do it again. That's it, full stop. While I can run editorial meetings, manage content flow, you will also see me finding paper for the printer, making the coffee run, and basically ready and waiting for something to go wrong. As a
long time project manager if you see me just sitting there it means I have built a solid professional team that is locked in and I can focus on the big picture.
I'm glad Marie critiqued the leadership of a passion project and ultimately made the decision to not get involved-- at least for now. You should always do that regardless of whatever relationship you do or do not have with the leader. At some point you'll have to decide when it's time to dive in head first. Passion projects are like that as you are either all the way in or all the way out.
Kind of like being married.
